Why We Do This…

An excerpt from a speech given in June 2015 by Pat Bayne, President of the Foundation:

The day before Thanksgiving 2012, we received biopsy results showing Ken had stage IV kidney cancer. We knew that day that the cancer had spread and learned later the main tumor was inoperable. Following an MRI in December, we learned that the cancer had also spread to Ken’s brain. Right before Christmas we started brain radiation, which continued until the day before Ken’s birthday in January 2013. Radiation alone makes you very very tired. We were also up every day and out of the house by 6:40 am to arrive at 7am for radiation. By 7:30 we would be back home and napping before we would get back up and go to work. A few weeks after the radiation ended, we began what ended up being the first of four drugs. This one, an angio-genesis drug, made Ken feel ill, and alone, or combined with the radiation, caused him to lose his appetite, which increased the brain fog and cancer-related fatigue.

Fighting cancer is a full time job; the business of cancer is another full-time job – oncology appointments, scans, bloodwork, authorizations for expensive drugs and scans, and arguing with insurance companies all create a new reality. There is no “down time” for anyone – Ken focused energy on resting and fighting to be well, both of us worked full-time and also tried to get the mundane things done like paying bills, feeding animals, gardening, keeping a pool cleaned and a house tidy. Over the years we had talked about hiring someone to clean the house and decided it was silly. By Spring 2013 I did not think it seemed quite so silly anymore. But the flip side is that you don’t know what is down the road, and spending money can seem foolish when you know the total cost of the drug you are taking is $7,000-8,000 a month and don’t know how long insurance will pay.  By August 2014, when we started an IV infusion, that cost jumped to $29,000 a month before insurance payments.

I remembered I had read about services that cleaned houses for cancer patients, and one Sunday when Ken was napping, I googled and learned that because there is such a need for services, they were accepting applications only from female cancer patients. That seemed unfair, but at the time it was a battle I did not have time to fight — though the idea of doing something about it kicked around in my head for nearly another two years, as did the belief that something good should come from all the pain and suffering. And so one nite in March Ken and I discussed the idea of a foundation that would provide cleaning services to men who are battling cancer. He loved the idea and named the foundation. The primary goal of the foundation is to provide house cleaning services to male cancer patients while they are receiving treatment; I thank you for sharing our vision and helping support our dream.